1000 Gifts-the beginning

So here begins MY list of 1000 gifts. Not gifts i want....(though that would be fun) but gifts i have already. I'll blog them here randomly when i have gathered a few in my pocket. This is not my original idea..i joined the Gratitude Community a while ago, but i haven't begun blogging my list...some are way to personal~some are not!

1) late morning sleep- ins

2) my sons child-like faith

3) my babies giggles & coos

4) new- budding friendships

5) dandelions hand-picked with love

6) soft baby sweaters knitted with love

7) sweet sibling love

Grace to go

you know, I think that God wants me to make sure that what i'm learning i'm really going to use. i can't get into the details of it all...way to personal..but I've had plenty of time to practice what I'm learning.

So shortly before i went on my retreat i finished reading Beth Moore's So Long Insecurity book. so much was at the front of my mind..and heavy on my heart...that when Grace started talking on much of the same i knew God was trying to tell me something...all of us woman. infact it dawned on me that GOD has used many popular authors Grace, Beth, and Max to name a few to send us the same message in a different book....trust God. sounds simple, sounds rather like a pat answer to me..but after a close look i'm starting to get it.

In the book mentioned above Beth tells of a conversation she had with God i will set the stage for you as humbly as i can as i'm no writer. Beth was telling us in this chapter that she had a conversation with God. God basically said "tell me your greatest fears" and she begged him not to push, but she eventually told him. God pushed her to see it through..to picture the 'worst case scenario' in her mind...to play it through imagining all the grief, all the loss, and sorrow that would accompany it. then God said....what happens next? and Beth realized that she'd probably be an emotional wreck...lie in bed for days, grieving, and feeling devastated. then eventually she'd pick herself up, get on her knees and seek the face of Jesus like she did EVERY OTHER time trouble came. and then God said to her this...

"As long as you are going to borrow trouble on the future, why don't you just go ahead and borrow the grace to go with it and see yourself back up on your feet defying your enemy's odds just as you and *I* have a dozen other times."

pretty powerful eh? heres another quote

Both Psalm 112:7-8 and Prov.31:25 describe secure people. Not coincidentally, they have one profound character in common. Neither gives the future the right to intimidate them. Their hearts are 'steadfast trusting in the LORD.'. Insecurity feeds like a starving wolf off fear of the future.-and not just the distant future of aging, infirmity, or death. Insecurity fears what might happen later today. Tonight. Tomorrow. Next week. Next Year. Next decade. Its constant mantra "What will i do if.....?" Fear of the future makes people settle for things in the present that completely defy abundant life. It also insults the grace of God that will be in heaps for us when hardships come. We agonize over how we'll possibly make it, yet all the while we can glance over our shoulders and see where God has carried us. And often through worse than we're afraid of now"

I have to admit I've been' borrowing trouble from tomorrow' for years...living with so much 'fear of the future' that it has crippled me. It has affected my friendships, family life, career, education, and most regrettably my relationship with God. my trust in God sounds more like 'God i trust that you'll bring the right man into my life' or 'God i trust that you'll keep my family safe'...not just ' God...i trust you.' thats hard...so in all of this- this crazy storm i'm currently in, i'm trying to remember that God HAS brought me threw sooo much. That He has prosperous plans for me...and that He will give me the grace to go through all of this...and the stuff to come.